The Dos and Don’ts of Proper Wedding Etiquette

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Planning a wedding is not a trouble-free task and can sometimes bring out the worst in people. During the planning stage, the bride and groom must try to take note of a few procedures to make guests, family and friends feel welcome, even if traditions are put aside.

As wedding customs continue to change, it gets harder and harder to keep track of what you should do and should not do before, during, and after your wedding day. To help guide you through the maze of rules and regulations, follow these tips, which you can change to your preference:

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Invitations - Your first connection to wedding guests is through invitations, which set the tone for your wedding and should reflect the theme and scope of your affair.

· Write the guest complete names on your wedding invitation. Some couples may opt to send invitations by email. Invite only the people listed to the event.

· Avoid writing “and Guest” on the invitation. Try to find out who your relative or friend will bring to the wedding and include his or her name on the invitation.

· Wedding-invitation wording is a preference. Most couples include their parents’ names on the invitations. However, if a parent is deceased, his or her name should not appear.

· If you know a guest is not in a relationship, do not feel obligated to offer a wedding invitation addressed for “two.” Subsequently, if you only invited one person but he or she adds another guest when sending back the RSVP, call him or her to explain financial or space constraints that prevent you from accommodating the guest.

· Do not mention gift preferences or registries on the invitation or include them in the package. If you have a preference, like monetary gifts or a donation to a charity, spread it through word of mouth before the event.

· Do not use labels on your invitations. Handwrite them, use a nice font and print the envelopes using a computer, or get them done with professional calligraphy.

Financial Responsibility - Finances can turn an engaging wedding plan into an unpleasant matter. By keeping in mind some general guidelines, things will run more efficiently.

· Tradition once stated that the bride’s parents would pay for the wedding. However, times have changed and more couples are opting to pay for the wedding themselves, or the groom’s family chips in.

· Traditionally, the mother of the bride pays for the bridal shower. The bridal attendants may contribute to the shower’s cost or assign jobs, such as purchasing favors or decorating the venue.

· Bridal attendants will split the cost of the bachelorette party, and the groomsmen will do the same with the bachelor party.

· It is usually the responsibility of the groom’s parents to pay for the rehearsal dinner. The spouses or significant others of wedding party members should be invited to dinner as well.       

Here are some other items and who should be financially responsible:

· Rice/birdseed/confetti bags to toss after the ceremony — bride’s family

· If you are following strict traditions, divide flowers between the bride’s family and the groom. However, these days, flowers are included in a “package” and usually whoever is paying for the wedding festivities covers the flowers.

· Marriage license — groom

· Pastor/officiant fee — groom

· Rings — bride and groom

· Bridesmaid dresses/tuxedos — bridal party or groomsmen

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Processional - If you are having a religious wedding, consult your priest, rabbi, deacon, imams, or officiant concerning the customary procedure for entering. Each house of worship may have rules concerning processional order, music, photos, etc. Keep in mind that stepparents or boyfriends/girlfriends of your parents should enter and be seated before your biological family.

Mother of the Groom - Often the mother of the groom does not know her place in wedding planning. She plays an important role and can be as involved as the couple would like. Some of her chief responsibilities include:

· Starting contact between her family and the bride’s family.

· Providing an accurate and timely guest list.

· Organizing and hosting the rehearsal dinner.

· Taking her place beside the bride and mother of the bride in the receiving line to thank guests for attending. Note that the mother of the bride dictates wedding day fashion, and the mother of the groom will wear a gown of similar style and length.

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Tipping - Gratuities are more often than not included in the cost of wedding services. However, if a wedding vendor, server, or other person has gone beyond the call of duty, extra tipping is appropriate. Some people who should receive a tip on the wedding day:

· Coatroom attendant or bridal party attendant.

· Pastor or officiant should receive no less than $100 for his or her services.

· Limousine drivers should receive 15 percent of the bill if a tip has not already been included.

· Organists and musicians at the ceremony should receive at least $50 per person.

· If your reception features a maitre d’ or headwaiter who oversees the staff, expect to tip this person as well.

Thank-you note - For more thoughts on this subject, click here

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Meet Liz Grace Davis, Young Adult and Romantic Women’s Fiction Author

Liz Grace Davis, Author

Liz Grace Davis is a Namibian author. She grew up in Angola, Namibia, South Africa and Germany. She now lives with her husband in Vienna, Austria. Growing up, Liz spent most of her days in school libraries, diving into the world of books. In her spare time, she loves to travel as well as creating jewelry and digital scrapbooks. She is in her element when she is doing anything that requires creativity. Liz is the author of a young adult fantasy novel, Tangi's Teardrops and a romantic women's fiction novel, Chocolate Aftertaste.

Following is a synopsis of Chocolate Aftertaste

At her pre-wedding dinner, Nora Darkin, the daughter of a wealthy entrepreneur, discovers her fiancé is not the man she thought he was. As her father hoists his glass to toast them, she makes an announcement: there will be no wedding to her father's right-hand man.

Due to the fresh rift driven between her and her father, Nora escapes to the quaint town of Dreara.

Determined to live her life her own way, she makes new friends and pursues her lifelong desire of becoming a chef. Ethan Danes, a neighbour with his own broken heart, helps soothe hers. 

Just as Nora discovers what it means to be happy, and she begins to fall in love with Ethan, a woman from his past re-enters his life…

Short Excerpt

Nora turned her attention back to the reality in front of her. She hated arguments; sometimes she wished she could hide somewhere, just wait them out. Unfortunately, life was not like that.

She lifted her eyes to meet Liam’s. The ice in his eyes had not melted. She dropped her gaze.

Instead of flirting with her appetite, the large marinated tiger prawns made her stomach queasy, and the oriental noodles looked like neglected yarn left out in the rain. From the way he dissected his steak, Liam’s appetite was just fine. She gritted her teeth as his knife scraped the porcelain plate.

Unable to bear the silence between them, she leaned forward and whispered, “I hate it when you ignore me.”

“What do you want me to say?” He chewed the last of his food and waved for the waiter. “We’re done.”

The waiter nodded and scuttled over to remove their plates.

When the waiter was out of earshot, Nora hissed through clenched teeth, “I wasn’t done.”

Liam took a swig of water, probably wishing it was something stronger. “You didn’t look like you were hungry.”

“Stop treating me like a child,” she snapped.

“Stop acting like one.”

Nora’s cheeks heated. She contained her anger with difficulty. “That’s really insensitive.”

“What do you want from me, Nora?” A vein pulsed in his neck. “What exactly do you want me to say?”

“Say you want me to be happy.” Her eyes brimmed. “Don’t ask me to get rid of my best friend.”

He loosened his tie—and then slammed his fist on the table, knocking over Nora’s glass of water. The silver stream raced straight for her lap.

The waiter appeared as if from nowhere to replace the white tablecloth with a new one. Nora forced a smile and whispered an apology. The waiter nodded, and a minute later he left.

Ignoring the curious looks they got from the other diners, she dabbed at the moisture on her black jeans.

“You can’t always explode every time I refuse to do what you want.”

Liam ignored her. “Ask to pay. I want to leave.”

Nora flinched, but abided. Paying wasn’t so bad—so long as it was fair. On their first and second date, he paid. On their third and a few more after that, they went Dutch. After one year, he asked her to pay for an occasional meal until it became an unspoken arrangement between them. The only thing Liam had paid for himself in three years was her engagement ring.

Some Goodreads Reviews:

Debbie Brown rated it «««««

I loved how real everything in this book felt. The characters came to life and easily pulled me into their story. The writing of this talented author paints intense emotions in a way that you can’t help but experience it all along with Nora as she learns to stand on her own and eventually spread her wings.

There were times where I was so sure of the decisions Nora was to take, only to be surprised by the creative path the author chose for her instead.

Liz describes the settings so well that you can see, feel and smell everything around Nora. By the end of the novel you will have experienced every emotion possible and watched Nora grow through her trials all while visiting the wonderful places created by the author.

This is not a sappy romance novel, but a book of life...Nora's life, with real feelings and all.

Naynay rated it  «««««

Nora Darkin is the daughter of a wealthy entrepreneur, about to marry his right-hand man, Liam Connolly. Her father could not think of a better son-in-law. But at her wedding dinner she announces there will be no wedding, Liam is not the man she thought he was. This decision puts a strain between Nora and her father, as Nora always lived up to his controlling ways just can not do it anymore. So Nora leaves and goes to a small town called Dreara. Here she makes new friends, she starts living her dream to be a chef, she is now living her own life. She meets Ethan Danes, her neighbor who has his own problems, he is there to help Nora. While their relationship grows Nora thinks she finally knows what it is to be happy. But then a woman from Ethan's past comes back into his life.

This is a story that starts off with the main character dealing with forgotten dreams, secrets, and broken promises. As the story continues it is a woman who decides to find herself and stand on her own. A search for new beginnings, learning to forgive, and finding real love. Liz Grace Davis penned such emotion into this story and created characters you easily fell in love with. It is a emotional and an inspiring read, and I want to tell you to BUY THIS BOOK!

I recieved this book from the author for an honest review....Thank-you Liz Davis for a wonderful story.

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