Monday, January 28, 2013
There is a fine line between being confident and being cocky. Girls like dating confident guys. If you feel like you’re lacking confidence already, go find some. Do push-ups, run a mile, make a list of things you’re good at, have mom tell you all your good qualities (actually, don’t talk to mom, she’s probably napping anyways). Did you gain some confidence? Well good, now we can move on to how to attract women.
Like I said, women rate confidence as one of the most desirable qualities in a man. That means that women like men who are sure of themselves, who aren’t shy and go after what they want. Some guys might make the excuse that they’re not entirely confident going on dates because they don’t have a great job or they don´t really know how to meet girls. Honestly, if you’re going out on first date, she won’t focus on the fact that you work as a deli or if you just finished your Master’s degree. Your job does not need to dictate your confidence level. Honestly, it’s not a big deal if you work at a deli or if you just finished your Master’s degree. The question is, “Do you have a job?” If your answer is yes, no matter what it is, you should be thankful that you’re better off than a lot of other people who don’t have one. Bam. You’re now more confident.
Now that I’ve started to build your confidence up, I need to make sure you’re not over the top. Take note guys, girls can be flattered by confident guys but they can also be repelled. If all you talk about is yourself, how great you are, how amazing the job/house/car (fill in the blank) that you have is…your conversation is bound to get a little old. No girl wants to hear about the time that you scored the winning touchdown more than twice. And that might be pushing it. (Unless she is really into sports and she has an equally great personal triumph to share. Everything is relative, of course).
Show off your smart, curious side and ask the girl a few questions when you’re on a date. It never hurts to throw in a few compliments too. Avoid cheesy pick up lines though – those go hand in hand with being egotistical. Be honest and say what you’re thinking. Women appreciate those qualities in men too.
Monday, January 21, 2013
There was a time when people met at social events, parties, through associates, family or friends? Even if someone used a professional matchmaking service, there was always that face-to-face encounter. You could analyze the person’s behavior, observe his or her body language or see how that person interacted with others. Moreover, if you were fortunate enough, you would meet that individual’s friends or family members to get a better picture of the man or woman with whom you had a romantic interest.
Once you established a good rapport with that individual, courting and dating were next. This did not mean that a person did not end up with a jerk, but at least he or she made some sort of physical contact with that individual before becoming romantically involved. But when it comes to on-line dating, distortion can result when online romance comes into play.
Recently, I checked out a talk show, and the topic was “Catfish and On-line Dating.” Since I never associated catfish with dating, I decided to watch the program. Catfish is a common name for freshwater fish, which is a scavenger that has feelers or barbels extending from the upper jaw and in some species from the lower jaw, resembling a cat’s whiskers.
With on-line dating, catfish has a completely different connotation. A catfish is a person who uses someone else’s photo or identity to entice women and men on an on-line dating site; the catfish will browse through profiles on various social networks, hijack photos and personal data and use the information to seduce singles into his or her web of deceit.
Several guests on the talk show explained how a catfish had duped them. One woman developed a two-year on-line dating relationship with a man she never met, and he turned out to be a woman. The clues were there: The catfish gave roughly ten reasons why he/she could not meet with her; some of the excuses given were, “A close relative of mine died; I suddenly came down with a sudden illness and have to have surgery; I was in a serious accident and will be incapacitated for the next several months.” Because people become so emotionally involved with their on-line partner, sometimes their common sense goes out the window.
The catfish, by nature, is a hunter, so it is understandable why experts referred to charlatans as catfish, because their main objective is to search for vulnerable singles, making certain they never meet them face to face and then play on their sentiments until they have psychologically scarred their prey.
It is always important to be mindful when you meet someone on an on-line dating site. Do not allow your longing to meet someone cloud your judgment. If a person refuses to meet you in person and comes up with too many pretexts, you may be dealing with a catfish.
Monday, January 14, 2013
The advent of the Internet has changed the face of dating forever. No longer are men and women restricted to dating within their own cultures and communities. Internet dating allows multicultural, multi-language and even multi-continental relationships to spring up in a setting that is devoid of the many stereotypes and prejudices that can make it difficult for multicultural sparks to fly in the ‘real world’. Men and women can embrace and celebrate terrific diversity in this new era of dating, exchanging old taboos for unity and a chance at love that breaks traditional barriers.
Any individual interested in multicultural dating must understand that there are more than just two people involved in a long-term relationship. A new love interest comes attached to a family, which may not be as progressive as others when it comes to crossing cultural boundaries’.
It is wise to prepare for possible resistance when first meeting a new love interest's family. Two general rules of thumb can help to prepare new for a potentially bumpy ride with the relatives:
1. Homework Helps - Before arriving at the front door, an individual should study the customs and culture of the family in question. This helps ensure that there will be no embarrassing faux pas and will also provide concrete ways to communicate honour to the relatives.
2. Give It Time - Families may hold on to certain misconceptions about a new multicultural relationship until they are disproved. They may believe that the relationship is just an experimental fling, an attempt to escape one's own culture and be rebellious or an opportunity to climb the social status ladder and fit into certain social groups. The only real way to combat these misconceptions is to demonstrate real love and commitment for one's partner over time.
While the number of multicultural couples is growing, they still represent a small percentage of the population. It is a common misconception that interracial couples are discriminated against or made to feel awkward in public. While this does happen at times, the vast majority of mixed couples enjoy a high level of acceptance in most parts of the world.
If a multicultural couple does happen to encounter prejudice or misunderstanding in some parts of the world, it is wise to approach the situation as a teachable moment. Couples should educate those whose bias is based on ignorance, and attempt to be patient and forgiving with those who simply cannot understand. Above all else, it is smart to not let the odd discriminator steal the joy out a good thing.
Many people mistakenly assume the individuals involved in a multicultural relationship have no prejudice or stereotyped expectations concerning other cultures. This assumption is false, as every virtually everyone harbours certain untrue beliefs about people from unfamiliar backgrounds whether this is based on media perceptions, cultural stereotypes or personal experience. Couples should exercise honesty and patience with one another. Love is a learning experience and stereotypes will be broken only with real communication and trust.
The Internet has made multicultural romance a real option in today's global society and whilst there are no set rules to dating from outside ones’ own culture or race, giving them the same respect and care you would to any new partner may not always be enough to bridge the gaps, so be sure so make an extra effort to understand the other person. This said, every couple will be a unique situation where their families’ acceptance and support is concerned but being respectful, honest and faithful should win over most partners’ families. One thing is certain though, misconceptions are being shattered and unity is accelerating around the world.
This is a guest post by Louise Mitchell, a relationship expert and advises couples with relationship troubles as well as helping singles on the ways to find the best partner for them. Louise is currently consulting with Lovestruck on their on-line dating site to help singles use a profiling service to help people find specific traits they are looking for in a partner to help you find your perfect match in the Singapore Singles Dating Scene.
Monday, January 07, 2013
|Cassietta Jefferson, Author|
Thank you for making One World Singles Magazine Blog one of your stops on your Virtual Book Tour and for sharing your insights to writing with our readers.
What type of characters do you enjoy creating? I enjoy creating characters that are quirky and a little off kilter. A lot of the characters I create have a little something about their personality that makes them slightly unlovable or difficult to like. I think it makes them more relatable and may remind the reader of someone they know.
Which authors have influenced you the most? There are so many authors who have had an influence on my style and voice, but I think I was most influenced by Francis Ray and Brenda Jackson.
Please tell our readers something about yourself. For the last 15 years, I’ve been married to my wonderful husband. We’ve raised three children (they’re all grown now) and have lived in a couple of different cities across the
. I’m really a simple girl. I love
my family; I love the Lord and have a desire to spread the message of Jesus
Christ. United States
Who or what inspired you to become an author. I love to read! I really enjoy a good book, but as I grew older, I was looking for something (a genre) that just wasn’t there. I figured if I wanted to read something different then others may also, so I started writing the stories that I wanted to read.
Have you ever received a negative comment or review about your book, and if so, how did you handle it? I have! I write contemporary Christian fiction but there’s an element of realism that some Christians don’t particularly go for. I write from a different perspective in that I know that even as Christians, we don’t always make right choices. One reviewer couldn’t get past some suggestive material, and I can understand that. I have to let it roll off my back and continue to write what the Lord has given me. I went into this industry, writing this genre, knowing that everyone was not going like it, and that’s okay.
As a writer, what has been your biggest challenge, trials or tribulations that you have overcome? The biggest challenge for me has been confidence. I just come to own the fact that I’m an author in the last few years. I’m terribly shy and so approaching someone to let them know that I’ve written and that I would love for them to read it has been hard but it comes easier for me now.
Could you please give us a blur about your present or upcoming book? I recently released Shades of Brown, is a collection of short stories about a group of friends who face some pretty incredible obstacles. The issues they face in their life changing and test not only their faith but test their friendship as well.
How can our readers get in touch with you? I love interacting with readers, so I am always on Facebook! :) Readers can follow me there, ask questions, and get to a know a little bit about me. They can also follow me on twitter and via my website.
About The Book
Bitterness and deception always manage to find their way to the surface. Be Still & Know is a novel about finding love after devastating heartbreak and the challenges of learning to trust again.
Kai Bennett never believed that she was worthy of love. Too many years of being mistreated left her bitter and uncertain of her own self-worth. Finding validation in men, money, and trinkets, she has little use for a man becoming a permanent fixture in her life. That was until she met
. What starts as a game of cat and
mouse quickly develops into something Kai is unsure she is ready to handle. Alvin
Alvin Reigns discovered long ago that in love, there were no happy endings. He had fallen in love once, and vowed to never again allow any woman that much control over his heart. Kai Bennett was an unexpected surprise who made him want to believe in the possibility of a happy ending. After many years of self-preservation,
is unsure if he should trust Kai
with his heart. How will Alvin and Kai
learn to trust and create their own happy ending? Alvin
To learn more, please visit Author's Website