Monday, July 16, 2012
The Break Up Test: How to Know When to Call it a Day
All relationships have their ups and downs, but sometimes the downs become too frequent and the best answer for both parties is to cut their losses and end the relationship. This can be a difficult decision but when there is a trouble in the air there are certainly signs you can look out for to determine whether or not the relationship has run its course:
When the relationship is new, your independence takes a back seat and you genuinely want to spend every waking minute with your other half. If you find yourself wanting to be alone, fantasising about a time when your other half wasn’t around or subconsciously planning a future that doesn’t involve them, then the relationship is doomed.
Everyone has rows, but if your disagreements are becoming nastier or more regular then it could be a sign of trouble looming. Similarly if you find yourself picking a fight for no reason or arguing in public, it is a clear sign that you’ve lost respect for each other.
Lack of Effort
Remember back in the early days how you’d go on dates or arrange romantic surprises? If those feelings have gone and you no longer feel the need to make an effort in the relationship then it’s probably time to call it a day. Indifference and apathy are clear signs that your heart's not in it anymore and the relationship has run its course.
Having Feelings for Someone Else
We’re all entitled to appreciate the beauty of the opposite sex, but if being with someone else becomes a real desire then there are clearly problems in the existing relationship. Some relationships can recover from affairs but be aware that it will require a lot of time, effort and genuine remorse.
No More Sex
Physical intimacy is a huge part of a relationship and if you find that there is no longer any enjoyment in your sex life then it can be a sign that the intimacy and love between you has gone. If everything else in the relationship is OK then this can be worked upon, but if it is the latest in a long list of problems then it’s probably time to cut your losses.
Francine Westbrook is a freelance writer from
who covers literature and textbooks for a number of student
blogs and education websites. England