Because so many people spend most of their time in the workplace, it is understandable how some individuals find pleasure and excitement in the office.
Photo by Edmond
Dantès
According to studies done in the
However, secret trysts in the boardroom and
chance encounters in the lift (elevator) can bring despair and intrigue to your
working day.
Whether you are already romantically involved at work, or just thinking about it, here is how to be ten steps ahead of heartache, embarrassment, and job loss.
Photo by Karolina
Grabowska
Leave him if he is married. You
will win very little support for your relationship and you can risk his
wife/girlfriend turning up at the office with a large tin of paint for your
car. Relationship psychotherapist Phillip Hodson says: 'It's not a crime to
fancy someone, but when there are families or other halves involved, you must think
of the consequences.'
Flirt discreetly. Discretion
is the key to a successful office romance. Brushing past someone or a stolen
glance over the photocopier is far more enticing than draping your body over
his desk. Remember, people are watching. Subtle flirting allows you to maintain
your professionalism and keep an air of mystery between you and your object of
desire.
Anticipate responses. Misreading the signals can be catastrophic. Is he smiling at you, or does he smile at everyone? Be aware that many people put on a 'friendly' mask at work. You risk enormous embarrassment and possibly your job if you proposition the boss and he does not know who you are. Do the groundwork. If you think he is interested, build up a friendship. It will improve your chances for a long-term relationship.
Photo by Thirdman
Decide whether to confide in colleagues - If you do not want
to be a regular feature of office gossip, it might be best to tell a few close
colleagues about your romance. That way people lose the intrigue and friends will
not feel excluded. However, workplace relationships can incite envy.
Think carefully about sex in the workplace. It
is all part of the package of an office romance, but if you do not want your
cloakroom exploits broadcast at the Christmas party, look out for security
cameras. It is better to save the passion for after-hours.
Watch your appearance. Do
not try too hard to catch his attention. It only takes a bit more lipstick and
a slightly shorter skirt for people to start chatting. If you do not want
colleagues to suspect your motives and to avoid malicious comments, keep your
look discreet.
Be careful with e-mails. Hit
the wrong key and the entire building will know how you like your strawberries
and whipped cream. It is likely that your company can access your e-mails, therefore,
be cautious.
Beware of company law. Although
there are no specific laws that prevent office romances, your company might
have its own policy.
Richard Isham, an employment lawyer at Wedlake Bell
Associates, says, 'Office romances are usually frowned upon because of the
issue of confidentiality. For instance, a company would be worried if the head
of IT was in a relationship with another employee. Important security
information could be transferred during pillow talk. Allegations of misconduct
can be made.'
Firms could also argue that office relationships
encroach on company time and disrupt the office environment. Some employers
will expect you to change departments. Read your contract thoroughly.'
Ask him to marry you. According to research, half of all workplace romances result in marriage. Try not to seem too eager, though. It is wise at least to ask him out before you ask him down the aisle.
Photo by Ron
Lach
Make sure you are the only one. Phillip Hodson
says, 'With any office romance', you have all your eggs in one basket; you are
very vulnerable.'
If you are going to risk your career, friends, and livelihood, then make sure he is worth it. If you know you are not the
first office conquest, steer clear.
Worse, if you did not know, give yourself time
to cool down. Do not sit there plotting a Lorena Bobbit type of revenge, concurrently
weeping uncontrollably. Talk about it after work with friends or family.
Would you engage in an office romance? Please leave your comments or opinions below.
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