|Photo by Yan Krukov|
If you are using dating apps, beware of people using enticements to pull you into their web of deception, namely Catfishing, defined as a deceptive act where a person creates an imaginary facade or fake identity on a social networking service, usually targeting a specific victim for financial gain, or to upset someone.
When searching for love, romance, dating, or marriage, finding your way around social media can be extremely confusing and overwhelming. In order to make it easier for you, you should know the following dating terms:
1. Catfishing - As already mentioned, someone who creates a new identity to deceive others into starting a relationship. It can be as harmless as unrealistic or highly filtered pictures or something as scary as dating someone who is actually a con artist.
2. Ghosting - This is someone you have been out with on multiple dates but does not reply to your messages for months and will suddenly end all forms of communication with no explanation or warning.
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3. Benching - Keeping someone on the sidelines, but not completely ignoring them. It can be a potential love interest. The person likes your pictures, sends you memes, but never actually makes plans to meet you.
4. Orbiting - This is a potential love interest that monitors you on social media but starts no dialogue. Some will interact with your posts, others will not. They will know everything that is going on in your life.
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5. Gaslighting - An individual will convince the other person what they are saying and remembering is far from the truth. The gaslighter convinces the other person that what they feel is false because that event never happened. Psychologists have termed gas lighting as a form of emotional abuse.
6. Breadcrumbing - You receive bits of attention and affection, thinking the person is interested in you but keeps stringing you along because the individual likes the chase but has no intent to commit.
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7. Soft Launch - This means you are posting your significant other on social media by dropping hints, posting a food picture from a cute brunch date but you can see their elbow on the table, or just posting a picture from a date with just two wine glasses in sight. It has to show people you are off the dating grid and seeing someone while maintaining confidentiality.
8. Situationship - When two people are doing everything that people do in a relationship but they refuse to put an official label on it. That is more than a friendship, not a committed relationship phase. It differs from friends with benefits because in this situation there is a clear non-involvement of emotions. In a Situationship, you are stuck in the muddy waters of an emotional and a physical connection.
9. Talking Stage - The talking stage is an introduction to exclusive dating. You go out on dates, try to get to know each other, and see if you would want to date him or her. However, unlike dating, in a talking stage, you can go out and "search" for other options.
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10. Love Bombing - You have just started going out with someone who showers you with tons of gifts, attention, and an over-the-top public display of affection. The person bombs you with their display of love, sweeping you off your feet, but often this leads to Gaslighting and abuse.
11. Zombies - They ghosted you, and you finally come to terms with that. However, just when you thought the chapter had ended, the person rises from the depths and sends you a "heyy" meaning he or she is into you. Just like a zombie, rising from the dead.
12. Roaching - You have been seeing someone for months and think it is exclusive, but then you discover the person is going out with other people too and hid it from you. The best way to avoid Roaching is to have a coherent conversation rather than an implied understanding.
13. Fishing - Someone sends out the same messages to a bunch of people and waits to see who would respond first and then go with the first responder.
14. DTR - Means Define The Relationship. Two people will have that 'talk' and clearly define where the relationship is heading.
15. Love Language - Different ways in which people express and like to receive love. There are five love languages: physical touch, words of affirmation, quality time, receiving gifts, and acts of service.
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