I
am hooked on Generations, a popular
soap opera that comes out of South Africa . The drama centers on men and women from diverse
social and economic backgrounds and deals with love, romance, relationships,
power, greed, money, and all the good stuff that human beings face on a daily basis.
Awhile
back, one of the storylines focused on two characters, Sibusiso, a successful
businessperson, and Ntombi, an independent and no-nonsense journalist who are planning
to tie the knot. The bride’s father is a well-respected leader in his community.
The couple had to participate in Lobola, which is a century old custom
practiced in many African countries and is similar to a dowry observed in various
Asian societies.
The
Lobola process is sometimes baffling to many contemporary couples since they
must follow certain protocols. The families may have known each other or lived
side by side for many years, but they do not know each other on the level of
the Lobola exchange. Since parents are not acquainted with each other at the height
of the seriousness and sanctity of marriage, all discussions between them must
be in writing and not by telephone, email, or via a swift visit.
Because
the extended family is an important element in the African culture, especially
in the institution of marriage, relatives, typically uncles of the groom
perform the negotiations and not the groom’s prospective parents.
An
impressive observance with dignity is involved when the negotiating "sides" from the families come
together. The tension between the two parties involved in the negotiations is
often broken by a bottle of brandy placed on a table. Even though the bottle
may be unopened, it indicates the least amount of anxiety and an acceptance of
the guests.
The
talks can take a couple of days and will usually center on the number of cattle
paid as the bride price. There is a current variation to this theme. Commonly, it is not cattle but the talk of
money. Cattle are symbolic and represent certain amounts of money. Once the
bride price or Lobola is established, the dialogues are formally over. Still, before
the actual wedding, the following of certain rules is mandatory. The young couple
cannot meet until the actual wedding ceremony.
Lobola
is still popular because it promotes harmony between the married couples and
their families and upholds a sense of dignity and support, which can aid the
marriage and encourages a harmonious union.
Source:
http://www.essortment.com
1 comment:
Take a look at:
Lobola Junction Traditional Weddings and Events
http://www.lobolajunction.com
http://facebook.com/lobolajunction
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