Monday, May 04, 2015

Steps to Take When Your Single Adult Child Moves Back Home

Today’s economic environment has made some singles questioning whether they can continue to live on their own. With mounting credit card debt, swelling student loans, soaring rental fees, and the prospects of not finding a decent paying job, many singles are opting to move back home with their parents or move in with other family members. In many cases, three generations may be living in the same household.

You are a parent who has finally gotten over the empty nest syndrome and is accustomed to your way of living. All of a sudden, your son or daughter wants to move back home because of financial difficulties. If you agree to have your adult child move in with you, it is extremely important to establish some non-negotiable ground rules.

If it means drawing up a written contract and having the individual sign that document, then do it. In the end, this will save you a lot of heartaches and misunderstandings. Remember this is your home, and you have every right to establish rules as to how an individual should respect you and your home. If they cannot abide by those policies, then they can find somewhere else to live.

Unless you have made long-range plans with your son or daughter, make it clear that the person is a guest in your home, and that his or her stay is short-term. Give him or her a specific date when they will have to leave. If you want them to pay rent, or room and board, but their funds will not allow it, have the person contribute in other ways.

He or she can do their own laundry, prepare the meals, or do the housework. If the person has their own bedroom, then that individual should keep his or her room neat and clean and make up their own bed, and not you, the owner of the premises. If a person has certain home improvement skills, he or she can apply those tasks to help perk up your home.

If you do not allow smoking or drinking in your home, enforce those policies. If partying on the weekends, engaging in recreational drugs, inviting strangers for an overnight stay or coming in all hours of the night are unacceptable, say so.

If you do not allow dogs or cats in your home, do not assume the person will not have other species from the animal kingdom as pets.  You may end up with a bird, lizard or hamster occupying your space.

Be consistent in the management of your home. If a person breaks any of the rules you have set forth, there should be no second chances. This may sound harsh, but remember, this is your home; you pay the mortgage or the primary rent; so, enforce those principles. If a person has a problem following the guidelines you set forth, then it is time for him or her to find some place else to live. 
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