Today’s economic environment has
made some singles questioning whether they can continue to live on their own. With
mounting credit card debt, swelling student loans, soaring rental fees, and the
prospects of not finding a decent paying job, many singles are opting to move
back home with their parents or move in with other family members. In many
cases, three generations may be living in the same household.
You are a parent who has finally
gotten over the empty nest syndrome and is accustomed to your way of living. All
of a sudden, your son or daughter wants to move back home because of financial
difficulties. If you agree to have your adult child move in with you, it is
extremely important to establish some non-negotiable ground rules.
If it means drawing up a written contract
and having the individual sign that document, then do it. In the end, this will
save you a lot of heartaches and misunderstandings. Remember this is your home,
and you have every right to establish rules as to how an individual should respect
you and your home. If they cannot abide by those policies, then they can find somewhere
else to live.
Unless you have made long-range
plans with your son or daughter, make it clear that the person is a guest in
your home, and that his or her stay is short-term. Give him or her a specific
date when they will have to leave. If you want them to pay rent, or room and
board, but their funds will not allow it, have the person contribute in other
ways.
He or she can do their own
laundry, prepare the meals, or do the housework. If the person has their own
bedroom, then that individual should keep his or her room neat and clean and
make up their own bed, and not you, the owner of the premises. If a person has
certain home improvement skills, he or she can apply those tasks to help perk
up your home.
If you do not allow smoking or
drinking in your home, enforce those policies. If partying on the weekends,
engaging in recreational drugs, inviting strangers for an overnight stay or
coming in all hours of the night are unacceptable, say so.
If you do not allow dogs or cats
in your home, do not assume the person will not have other species from the
animal kingdom as pets. You may end up
with a bird, lizard or hamster occupying your space.
Be consistent in the management
of your home. If a person breaks any of the rules you have set forth, there
should be no second chances. This may sound harsh, but remember, this is your
home; you pay the mortgage or the primary rent; so, enforce those principles.
If a person has a problem following the guidelines you set forth, then it is
time for him or her to find some place else to live.
